Sunday, 23 June 2013

10 WEIRD WAYS TO GET WARM WITHOUT SPOONING

I have just discovered these ten ways weird ways of keeping warm this winter.
For All You Filthy Minds That Were Starting To Chuckle These Will Not Be Excuses for You to Spoon. To make things clear the topic for this would be: Ten weird ways to get warm without spooning.

1.Instead of wearing meat like lady gaga cook it.

2.  Stock pile a lot of junk food especially coke and make obesity a goal. Ask yourself this question “do you think the half ton killer gets cold?”

3. Make a collection of cesspool rats and sew yourself a fur coat.

4. This is a very effective option. Instead of sleeping on a bed invest on a sleeping bag and fart yourself to sleep.

5. Get a load of Lil Wayne lyrics this will not keep you warm but you will be laughing at them so hard you will forget it’s cold. If you are South African watch ekasi: our stories.

6. Never shave!! I repeat never shave!!!

7. Invest in a good playlist that will make you dance all over the place.

8.  Find a science wiz and bribe them to rub your body. The excitement of friction will make them continue or just tell them that if they don’t do it you will find a way to put them in drama.

9. Stop microwaving your stinky, sweat filled hot socks (it’s disgusting) and buy a sleepaconda.

10. Finally and it won’t be body heat. The tenth way of keeping warm this winter is that while you are in that sleeping bag farting yourself to warmth ensure that you are naked.

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